NYC PODCAST AWARDS WORKSHOP SESSION 2

I was… I was debating with myself. I was gonna do it anyway if nobody showed up.

‍

69

00:20:21.290 --> 00:20:25.289

Mike Dias: Right? Because… what I love about this is…

‍

70

00:20:26.150 --> 00:20:34.779

Mike Dias: If you look at the biggest, biggest performers and the biggest stars selling out the packed 60,000, 80,000 seat arenas.

‍

71

00:20:34.890 --> 00:20:38.189

Mike Dias: Each one of them started off by playing a lot of empty rooms.

‍

72

00:20:38.730 --> 00:20:41.619

Mike Dias: And, as you both know as creators.

‍

73

00:20:43.060 --> 00:20:55.749

Mike Dias: that's the road, that's the part that nobody sees, right? People only really see when you're big and you have grown your audience, they don't see all the empty rooms that it took to get there.

‍

74

00:20:56.580 --> 00:20:58.840

Mike Dias: And so the first time I played in Empty Room.

‍

75

00:20:58.940 --> 00:21:02.349

Mike Dias: I had a much bigger ego, and…

‍

76

00:21:03.130 --> 00:21:18.470

Mike Dias: wanted to cry, and thought about running away, and I just sat there and sulked. And then finally, like, by the grace of God, the fire alarm in the casino was pulled. I was, like, in the downstairs, lower, lower basement of this show floor.

‍

77

00:21:18.830 --> 00:21:30.699

Mike Dias: And the fire alarm took, and I thought it was, like, my sign, and I took off, and I didn't even stay for the rest of the conference, and I just blew it completely. And I go back home, and my wife and daughter were like, well, how was it? I was like.

‍

78

00:21:31.280 --> 00:21:37.819

Mike Dias: It was horrible. Nobody… nobody showed up. I was giving a talk on, Hey Tara, good to see you.

‍

79

00:21:38.680 --> 00:21:46.399

Mike Dias: I was given a talk on hearing safety, and nobody wants to hear anything about hearing safety. People would rather, you know.

‍

80

00:21:46.940 --> 00:21:52.899

Mike Dias: nobody could care anything about that. And my wife and daughter were like, well, we wanted to be in the audience, and

‍

81

00:21:53.350 --> 00:21:59.469

Mike Dias: Hugh told us to leave, and you would have at least had two people, so… It's your own fault.

‍

82

00:21:59.520 --> 00:22:14.459

Mike Dias: And so tonight, I was gonna do it, and just… just power through it, play in an empty room, so I could send out the recording, and so I could get the chops anyway. So at least I passed that test. Tara, I'm thanking everybody for… it's just the three of us right now.

‍

83

00:22:14.460 --> 00:22:20.979

Mike Dias: Didn't mean to book us on a Friday night, Saturday morning, or super, super late Friday night for you.

‍

84

00:22:21.580 --> 00:22:25.280

Mike Dias: But I clearly can't use a calendar.

‍

85

00:22:25.720 --> 00:22:33.429

Mike Dias: And so, what I wanted to really focus on today, whereas yesterday was sort of big picture, today is a very nuts and bolts mechanical.

‍

86

00:22:33.910 --> 00:22:35.050

Mike Dias: And…

‍

87

00:22:35.270 --> 00:22:42.849

Mike Dias: what was very clear from everybody's win, and from hearing from everyone, everybody wants the same thing, right? Everybody wants to know.

‍

88

00:22:43.370 --> 00:22:45.839

Mike Dias: How can I grow my audience?

‍

89

00:22:46.630 --> 00:22:49.650

Mike Dias: And how can I give more to my community?

‍

90

00:22:50.060 --> 00:22:57.980

Mike Dias: And then, when we're being a little bit more honest, right, how can I… be bigger. Be better.

‍

91

00:22:58.380 --> 00:23:03.449

Mike Dias: and have more impact, right? How can I achieve all my hopes, goals, and dreams?

‍

92

00:23:04.070 --> 00:23:11.229

Mike Dias: And the answer for that is twofold, and it's this interesting dynamic, and it's really at the heart of everything we've been talking about so far.

‍

93

00:23:11.740 --> 00:23:14.799

Mike Dias: The first way you do that is by doing the work.

‍

94

00:23:15.260 --> 00:23:30.169

Mike Dias: And I'm going to assume that everybody who has entered and moved through this podcast award is already doing the work, right? You've already honed your craft, you're refining your craft, you're in the process of always doing the work.

‍

95

00:23:30.380 --> 00:23:38.359

Mike Dias: It's so easy to… well, first of all, there's so much work to do, and that part of the journey is never done, right?

‍

96

00:23:40.610 --> 00:23:49.490

Mike Dias: And it's so hard to get great at what you're doing, at the work itself, that it takes up all the time.

‍

97

00:23:49.760 --> 00:23:56.899

Mike Dias: And once you're in it, it's very easy to stay in it, because that all of a sudden becomes comfortable, right? How do you do it?

‍

98

00:23:58.150 --> 00:24:08.439

Mike Dias: Oh, yeah, yeah. No, no worries, Tara, thanks for the heads up. It's so easy to stay in the work, as hard as it is, because that's…

‍

99

00:24:08.580 --> 00:24:16.630

Mike Dias: known and familiar, right? And we think, oh, if I just keep doing the work, I'm going to find that audience or deliver more value.

‍

100

00:24:17.530 --> 00:24:24.430

Mike Dias: Except that that's not 100% true, because the other part of it, and it is equally important.

‍

101

00:24:24.990 --> 00:24:27.070

Mike Dias: Is… who you know.

‍

102

00:24:27.540 --> 00:24:36.109

Mike Dias: Like everything else in life, the people that you know, the people who are in your audience, the people who are rooting for you and want to see you succeed.

‍

103

00:24:38.030 --> 00:24:38.940

Mike Dias: And…

‍

104

00:24:39.370 --> 00:24:58.660

Mike Dias: trying to balance both is really hard. Like, how do you perfect your craft? How do you hone the work, and how do you continuously put yourself in new situations, meeting new people, recruiting new cheerleaders, and sharing your hopes and dreams and visions so that people can root for you and want to come along?

‍

105

00:24:58.840 --> 00:25:02.969

Mike Dias: And that's why we talked about Saying yes and showing up.

‍

106

00:25:03.090 --> 00:25:09.240

Mike Dias: Because that's the only other way you're ever going to meet more people, right? More people are not going to magically fall in your lap.

‍

107

00:25:09.460 --> 00:25:20.309

Mike Dias: And even your audience, who's engaging and listening to you and has a parasympathetic relationship with each of you, right? They're inviting you into their homes, they're inviting you into their headspace.

‍

108

00:25:20.450 --> 00:25:23.839

Mike Dias: They've actually… your audience has developed a relationship with you.

‍

109

00:25:25.010 --> 00:25:32.730

Mike Dias: But because we live in such weird times and so many social dynamics and frictions and fear, not everyone in your audience reaches out.

‍

110

00:25:33.010 --> 00:25:36.709

Mike Dias: to build a relationship with you. That's on you to do.

‍

111

00:25:37.130 --> 00:25:39.630

Mike Dias: And this is where it gets really tricky, because

‍

112

00:25:40.710 --> 00:25:49.759

Mike Dias: not only is it a muscle that's not exactly comfortable for everybody, right, we talked about this before, these are skills and processes to follow, and

‍

113

00:25:50.960 --> 00:25:57.639

Mike Dias: Steps, if you will, to build the muscle of feeling comfortable and feeling outside of your comfort zone.

‍

114

00:25:58.160 --> 00:26:02.580

Mike Dias: I happened to find a little bit of inspiration knowing that

‍

115

00:26:02.940 --> 00:26:09.550

Mike Dias: when I put myself out of my comfort zone, and when I do things like give a talk to three people Friday night.

‍

116

00:26:11.690 --> 00:26:13.000

Mike Dias: I…

‍

117

00:26:13.250 --> 00:26:23.699

Mike Dias: I get a chance to meet new people, and that's the bottom line of it, right? Like, for all the stuff that goes on in my head, or all the fear that goes into it before it, and all the prep.

‍

118

00:26:23.860 --> 00:26:29.270

Mike Dias: Getting the chance to… Meet new people makes it worth it every time.

‍

119

00:26:30.010 --> 00:26:31.270

Mike Dias: And so…

‍

120

00:26:31.880 --> 00:26:37.270

Mike Dias: That's what I want to talk about. Like, this core dynamic and this interplay and this back and forth.

‍

121

00:26:37.880 --> 00:26:43.780

Mike Dias: And then this idea that when you say yes and you show up, then you're left with, -oh.

‍

122

00:26:44.030 --> 00:26:45.520

Mike Dias: What am I gonna talk about?

‍

123

00:26:46.180 --> 00:26:52.019

Mike Dias: And, like, and what am I going to give? What am I going to offer? Because those two things are very, very real.

‍

124

00:26:53.110 --> 00:26:58.489

Mike Dias: And I think I've deconstructed this and decoded this, where at least for me.

‍

125

00:26:58.700 --> 00:27:07.289

Mike Dias: I have a process where I feel very comfortable talking to any stranger at all anymore. And I happen to go into it knowing that

‍

126

00:27:08.130 --> 00:27:15.259

Mike Dias: I don't really think of anybody as a stranger. I think of people just on a continuum of a relationship that is about to or will develop.

‍

127

00:27:15.880 --> 00:27:23.529

Mike Dias: And so I have two steps that I follow every time. And the first one, and this to me is where it gets the most interesting, is that

‍

128

00:27:24.010 --> 00:27:26.069

Mike Dias: I only talk about things I care about.

‍

129

00:27:26.340 --> 00:27:30.469

Mike Dias: I am way too old to pretend to be somebody that I'm not at this point in time.

‍

130

00:27:31.270 --> 00:27:32.420

Mike Dias: And…

‍

131

00:27:32.780 --> 00:27:47.630

Mike Dias: I know that I'm a dude, but I could care less about cars. Like, I don't even know what car I drive. Like, I walk in… I walk into strangers' cars thinking that they're mine. They're all black. It doesn't make a difference, right? And so, I can't…

‍

132

00:27:47.630 --> 00:27:53.759

Mike Dias: in good faith or in good conscience, talk to somebody about their car, because I just don't care.

‍

133

00:27:54.050 --> 00:27:55.430

Mike Dias: And I know that's…

‍

134

00:27:55.620 --> 00:28:02.120

Mike Dias: completely contradictory to most networking advice. Like, oh, find something the other person's excited about and talk to them.

‍

135

00:28:03.580 --> 00:28:07.990

Mike Dias: But I'm not talking about networking, I'm talking about building relationships.

‍

136

00:28:08.280 --> 00:28:19.450

Mike Dias: And if you're building a relationship on a pretense that isn't real from the get-go, it's not a relationship, it's exploitation, or manipulation, or just trying to get somebody to do something for you.

‍

137

00:28:19.800 --> 00:28:26.589

Mike Dias: And that's… That… we've already established that in Session 1, that's not what this is about at all, okay?

‍

138

00:28:27.130 --> 00:28:31.580

Mike Dias: And so, the second thing that I do, is that I…

‍

139

00:28:31.920 --> 00:28:37.689

Mike Dias: try to make myself as comfortable as possible. And I have a really good trick for that. And…

‍

140

00:28:38.000 --> 00:28:52.509

Mike Dias: it's useful, because in my line of work, I happen to have to interface with some giant global pop stars and people who would make me very nervous, and I happen to be a very nervous and anxious person anyway by nature.

‍

141

00:28:52.710 --> 00:28:54.270

Mike Dias: And so if I did not…

‍

142

00:28:54.950 --> 00:28:59.810

Mike Dias: do this trick, I would just come off as a complete and total absolute putz.

‍

143

00:29:00.020 --> 00:29:05.990

Mike Dias: And so I go into it, psyching myself out.

‍

144

00:29:06.120 --> 00:29:12.429

Mike Dias: Assuming that I already know the person from a long time ago, like, that we were childhood friends.

‍

145

00:29:12.760 --> 00:29:17.010

Mike Dias: And I do that because it de-escalates the fear for me.

‍

146

00:29:17.200 --> 00:29:29.160

Mike Dias: Right? And when I de-escalate my own fear, and I control my own anxiety, then I shift the energy in the room, I shift the dynamic, and I allow the other person to also feel comfortable.

‍

147

00:29:29.510 --> 00:29:32.920

Mike Dias: Because it turns out most people don't like to… be…

‍

148

00:29:33.270 --> 00:29:40.869

Mike Dias: anyone coming in their space in that way, right? And so when I control my energetic field, and when I control my comfort level.

‍

149

00:29:42.010 --> 00:29:59.489

Mike Dias: I'm also balancing it for the other person and making them at ease, which is really my only job, and so I'm never trying to sell anything, I'm never trying to get anything, I'm just trying to make everybody that I meet as comfortable as possible. I want to be a consummate host and hostess, right? That, to me.

‍

150

00:29:59.560 --> 00:30:04.309

Mike Dias: is what life becomes about, and so this dynamic of…

‍

151

00:30:05.010 --> 00:30:10.459

Mike Dias: Only talking about what's interesting to me, and trying to make the other person comfortable.

‍

152

00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:19.010

Mike Dias: once we get into that groove, then we're just gonna shift and shift and shift and find what's interesting, and we're just gonna hit our groove. And if it was up to me.

‍

153

00:30:19.190 --> 00:30:25.609

Mike Dias: I would just simply talk about cigars, whiskey, and horse racing with everybody that I ever met all day long.

‍

154

00:30:27.230 --> 00:30:38.689

Mike Dias: But, lucky for the three of you, I also have a few other joys in life that I'm able to code shift and find, like, the things that I'm really interested in. And it's…

‍

155

00:30:38.910 --> 00:30:45.800

Mike Dias: on me… And on you, as we're having a relationship, to find where there's overlap.

‍

156

00:30:46.370 --> 00:30:53.390

Mike Dias: I better tell you that. I was hoping… I was really hoping, please tell me it's Red Breast.

‍

157

00:30:56.880 --> 00:31:01.949

Mike Dias: Hold on, he'll wait for it, wait for it.

‍

158

00:31:03.270 --> 00:31:08.820

Mike Dias: Okay, fair, fair enough. So… So…

‍

159

00:31:09.000 --> 00:31:27.330

Mike Dias: the reason that I'm really good at talking about what I know is because I've taken the time to really know myself. And I want to share this, because while this may seem silly, or it may feel like I've just turned myself into a classified ad.

‍

160

00:31:27.440 --> 00:31:33.930

Mike Dias: Or, like, you know, like, whatever the… whatever those old jokes are. This is me, like…

‍

161

00:31:34.070 --> 00:31:45.560

Mike Dias: this is me to a T. Like, I could give this to my wife, and she'd be like, oh yeah, that's him. And I'm an old dog, and I ain't learning any new tricks, and if it's not on this list, it's really just not getting my attention. And so…

‍

162

00:31:46.070 --> 00:31:52.919

Mike Dias: If you come to me at a party, and you want to tell me about football, the football game, and about your car, or this or that.

‍

163

00:31:53.400 --> 00:32:09.830

Mike Dias: I'm gonna kinda just mumble and look for the exit, right? But if you come and you're talking to me about your cactus collection, or your last trek through the Atacama, I'm hanging on your every word. And if you really, really want something from me and want to butter me up.

‍

164

00:32:10.290 --> 00:32:17.980

Mike Dias: and we talk about Ali and old-school funk, then I'm putty in your hands, and I'm gonna take this down because I'm a little…

‍

165

00:32:18.190 --> 00:32:37.719

Mike Dias: feeling a little overexposed, but I will send you a copy of that, because this is your homework assignment, is each of you is going to have to create a chart just like this of who you are, what makes you tick, what are the things that you're interested in and into, the things you're going to go down your own rabbit hole about.

‍

166

00:32:37.850 --> 00:32:39.790

Mike Dias: What's gonna be really interesting is that

‍

167

00:32:40.330 --> 00:32:47.000

Mike Dias: Because you're 8 steps ahead of me and everybody else on this, it's gonna actually just sort of be a masthead of your show.

‍

168

00:32:47.780 --> 00:32:53.540

Mike Dias: Really, because each of you is so fluent in the things that are enjoyable.

‍

169

00:32:53.660 --> 00:32:59.600

Mike Dias: You've turned it into an outward manifestation of what you already do and love.

‍

170

00:33:00.220 --> 00:33:10.030

Mike Dias: There will be things that are on your list that are not in your show, but you pick and pull from those threads and weave them into your show and into your audience, right?

‍

171

00:33:11.040 --> 00:33:11.850

Mike Dias: Now…

‍

172

00:33:12.130 --> 00:33:20.020

Mike Dias: Here's where this gets really interesting, and what you're going to do with these maps of possibilities once you have them, besides for only talking about these things. And if you…

‍

173

00:33:20.340 --> 00:33:29.430

Mike Dias: Drift, and you find yourself talking about celebrity gossip, or whatever secret shame that you might have, still, whenever you meet somebody, and you resort to small talk.

‍

174

00:33:29.750 --> 00:33:40.260

Mike Dias: If that's real and honest and accurate, then that's okay, put that on your list. But if, in general, if it's not on your list, you shouldn't be wasting your time or anybody else's.

‍

175

00:33:40.490 --> 00:33:41.880

Mike Dias: Going on about it.

‍

176

00:33:43.040 --> 00:33:43.850

Mike Dias: Now…

‍

177

00:33:44.680 --> 00:33:53.820

Mike Dias: where this gets really fun, and how this starts to tie in to the homework that I'd asked you to do before, when I asked you to take a sort of a landscape survey of who you know.

‍

178

00:33:53.990 --> 00:33:56.449

Mike Dias: this starts to make more sense, right? Because if…

‍

179

00:33:56.900 --> 00:34:01.159

Mike Dias: If our big goals and aspirations are limited by the people that we know.

‍

180

00:34:01.380 --> 00:34:03.829

Mike Dias: It makes sense to start with who we know.

‍

181

00:34:04.070 --> 00:34:10.729

Mike Dias: Right? And what their everyday realities are, and I asked you to rank the, you know, how well you know them, too, because

‍

182

00:34:12.020 --> 00:34:16.660

Mike Dias: There's that old saying that life's about who you know, and that's 100% true.

‍

183

00:34:17.940 --> 00:34:23.700

Mike Dias: But there's nuances, and it's subtle. It's… my wife and I go back and forth about this all the time, right?

‍

184

00:34:24.080 --> 00:34:42.799

Mike Dias: I was born and raised in Las Vegas, and man, what I can't do with 20 bucks in my hand. Like, life really is about who you know in Las Vegas. And my wife came from Peru, her family are immigrants, and everything for her was work super hard, go to the best school you can, you know.

‍

185

00:34:42.870 --> 00:34:45.240

Mike Dias: Really work your way up.

‍

186

00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:46.860

Mike Dias: And both…

‍

187

00:34:47.060 --> 00:34:57.359

Mike Dias: Ways of being and knowing and understanding the world are absolutely valid and correct, and how we've been able to merge our dual philosophies is

‍

188

00:34:57.560 --> 00:35:05.730

Mike Dias: Life's about who you know, but it's also about how well you know them. The degree of the relationship matters, right?

‍

189

00:35:06.360 --> 00:35:12.589

Mike Dias: That's the part that gets really interesting, and so… When you think about this.

‍

190

00:35:15.590 --> 00:35:17.250

Mike Dias: when you…

‍

191

00:35:19.570 --> 00:35:25.280

Mike Dias: the reason I bring it up is because anybody that you first meet starts off as a stranger.

‍

192

00:35:26.190 --> 00:35:27.470

Mike Dias: And…

‍

193

00:35:27.610 --> 00:35:38.140

Mike Dias: The idea of authentic and effective networking is to figure out how to move people up the ladder from being strangers to a relationship in a true and genuine way.

‍

194

00:35:38.550 --> 00:35:42.009

Mike Dias: And the fastest and easiest ways to do that…

‍

195

00:35:42.330 --> 00:35:55.840

Mike Dias: are by inviting people out, like we talked about, whenever you have to go to a work function that you don't want to show up alone to. It's easy to invite somebody else, and you're turbocharging the relationship there.

‍

196

00:35:56.240 --> 00:36:00.000

Mike Dias: And the second way to turbocharge any relationship is to share.

‍

197

00:36:00.600 --> 00:36:03.579

Mike Dias: And to share the things that you actually care about.

‍

198

00:36:03.880 --> 00:36:18.760

Mike Dias: Right? Dot, when I saw your two main headlines on your blog post, I got so excited because those are two things that I actually really, really care about. And I instantly shared with my wife and then with my daughter.

‍

199

00:36:18.960 --> 00:36:25.459

Mike Dias: Right? Because when you find something that you care about, and by the way, the things that you care about.

‍

200

00:36:25.850 --> 00:36:42.289

Mike Dias: The rest of the world doesn't. They're exciting and important to us, and nobody else cares at all. That's the whole point of filters and finding community, right? You're lucky when people like what you like, and when you're able to share what you have that you genuinely, genuinely will go down any rabbit hole with.

‍

201

00:36:42.430 --> 00:37:02.369

Mike Dias: If you could find somebody who is equally or more excited about that than with you, you're turbocharging that relationship to a T. Like, you saw in my penchant for West African music, so could you imagine my excitement when I found out that Erika Badu had curated Phila Kuti's fourth box set?

‍

202

00:37:02.470 --> 00:37:11.719

Mike Dias: Okay, nobody in the world cared about that, except for me and two other people that I know, but I sure made those two people happy when I was able to share that piece, right?

‍

203

00:37:12.880 --> 00:37:18.150

Mike Dias: And so… What's the point of moving people from

‍

204

00:37:18.960 --> 00:37:22.580

Mike Dias: Strangers into the deeper relationships, right?

‍

205

00:37:22.710 --> 00:37:29.070

Mike Dias: Well, it matters, because if you go back to that idea that it really matters on how well you know somebody.

‍

206

00:37:31.640 --> 00:37:39.750

Mike Dias: I had asked each of you when you were doing your survey of who you know how to rank people, and I want to kind of share the way that I think about ranking.

‍

207

00:37:40.190 --> 00:37:42.370

Mike Dias: So I put in a level zero.

‍

208

00:37:42.490 --> 00:37:44.999

Mike Dias: Which is a little different than usual.

‍

209

00:37:45.270 --> 00:37:47.950

Mike Dias: And I use that as a bookmark, as a placeholder.

‍

210

00:37:48.440 --> 00:38:03.280

Mike Dias: I think of zeros as people I want to know, like, that I didn't even know existed, perhaps. And I read about them in a trade show book, or I read about them in a magazine, or somebody I thought was really interesting.

‍

211

00:38:04.250 --> 00:38:10.870

Mike Dias: all of a sudden, it's sort of like I'm uncovering new pieces of a map, uncharted territories, and…

‍

212

00:38:10.990 --> 00:38:26.949

Mike Dias: what? There's a whole different land, or a whole little new piece of my interest that I didn't know about, and it's spearheaded by so-and-so, or so-and-so's a part of it, right? And so, zero is my placeholder of somebody that I would like to meet one day.

‍

213

00:38:27.950 --> 00:38:30.889

Mike Dias: One… is just data.

‍

214

00:38:31.580 --> 00:38:36.599

Mike Dias: And again, this is just how I think about it, but we live in a world where you can find anybody at any time.

‍

215

00:38:37.300 --> 00:38:40.109

Mike Dias: Having somebody's name, phone number, email.

‍

216

00:38:40.730 --> 00:38:48.380

Mike Dias: is useless. Having somebody's business card that you met at a show? Useless. It's just data. It's ubiquitous, and it has no meaning.

‍

217

00:38:48.810 --> 00:38:51.850

Mike Dias: Data does not know you and does not have a face.

‍

218

00:38:52.070 --> 00:38:54.910

Mike Dias: Level 2 contact.

‍

219

00:38:55.220 --> 00:39:03.589

Mike Dias: It's just a little tiny step up above data. Like, maybe you've exchanged some… Messages back and forth, but…

‍

220

00:39:03.760 --> 00:39:13.340

Mike Dias: Nothing ever happened, you never completed a project together. Projects are where the energetic bonds start to get strong, no matter how small the projects

‍

221

00:39:13.670 --> 00:39:19.510

Mike Dias: Projects breed familiarity, right? Sharing, inviting, energetic overlap.

‍

222

00:39:19.940 --> 00:39:24.799

Mike Dias: That's number 3, as you're familiar. And what's really cool about number 3

‍

223

00:39:25.880 --> 00:39:29.729

Mike Dias: You don't even have to like the person to be a number 3.

‍

224

00:39:30.550 --> 00:39:37.739

Mike Dias: That person at the office who you might not really enjoy their company, but you see every day, and who you respect.

‍

225

00:39:38.020 --> 00:39:43.190

Mike Dias: That's still a level 3. Like, people in your neighborhood, in your community, who you…

‍

226

00:39:43.630 --> 00:39:47.940

Mike Dias: See it at the shop, or at the restaurant, but you don't really know.

‍

227

00:39:48.560 --> 00:39:57.580

Mike Dias: That's probably your level 3, too, and this is a good thing, because most people are playing at level 2, and if we're honest, we look at our phone, all the numbers in our phone.

‍

228

00:39:57.890 --> 00:40:04.880

Mike Dias: Lots of those are number twos, right? The more threes you have, the better, because there's actually something there.

‍

229

00:40:05.070 --> 00:40:06.820

Mike Dias: Fours, to me.

‍

230

00:40:06.960 --> 00:40:24.690

Mike Dias: That's your network, that's people who you have a genuine affinity for, right? There's something that's there, and they're bringing you favors, and they're rooting for you, and you do the same for them. And then number 5, that's your inner circle, those are your people. And if you ever really want to know who's your number 5,

‍

231

00:40:25.060 --> 00:40:31.330

Mike Dias: Look around when the bad stuff happens. Like, who's there for you when the stuff's hitting the fan?

‍

232

00:40:31.650 --> 00:40:35.290

Mike Dias: The people who are there for you when things are down and out.

‍

233

00:40:35.840 --> 00:40:38.959

Mike Dias: That's your innermost circle, that's your number 5.

‍

234

00:40:40.460 --> 00:40:43.640

Mike Dias: And the reason I try to think about this…

‍

235

00:40:44.040 --> 00:40:46.690

Mike Dias: And the reason I try to think about

‍

236

00:40:47.670 --> 00:40:51.489

Mike Dias: the things that I like, and the overlaps of where we bond.

‍

237

00:40:51.930 --> 00:40:57.790

Mike Dias: I'm gonna ask you to go back to your list now with this new way of thinking about things and this new information.

‍

238

00:40:58.200 --> 00:41:01.920

Mike Dias: Go back to your first survey, and I want you to do 4 things, okay?

‍

239

00:41:02.450 --> 00:41:06.469

Mike Dias: First, for any name that you see, I want you to think about the shared overlaps that you have.

‍

240

00:41:07.110 --> 00:41:20.760

Mike Dias: And then I want you to think about how you ranked them, and I wanted you to do rankings before I gave you my definition, so you run into the squishy borders that are really quite fluid, and to see how you struggled with that. And go ahead and…

‍

241

00:41:21.060 --> 00:41:25.039

Mike Dias: Review or re-rank if wanted and if necessary.

‍

242

00:41:26.320 --> 00:41:30.590

Mike Dias: And more important than anything, when you're going back through that list.

‍

243

00:41:31.180 --> 00:41:33.779

Mike Dias: Reach out and say hello to people that you…

‍

244

00:41:33.980 --> 00:41:40.589

Mike Dias: haven't connected with in a while. And you actually don't need ever an excuse. We always think we need an excuse to reach out to somebody.

‍

245

00:41:40.850 --> 00:41:51.599

Mike Dias: That goes back to those open energetic loops that I was talking about yesterday, but the truth is, is you don't ever need an excuse. It's as easy as saying, hey, your name popped up, I was just thinking of you, and I wanted to say hello.

‍

246

00:41:52.120 --> 00:41:53.040

Mike Dias: That's it.

‍

247

00:41:55.370 --> 00:42:05.659

Mike Dias: And then lastly, while you're looking through and ranking all of this and thinking of overlaps, I want you to look for patterns, because we're all pattern recognition machines, right?

‍

248

00:42:05.990 --> 00:42:12.529

Mike Dias: You're going to see 10 to 20 groupings, and they're probably based around what people do for a living.

‍

249

00:42:15.830 --> 00:42:21.289

Mike Dias: And it's really useful to start to think and to categorize your list around that. Now.

‍

250

00:42:21.830 --> 00:42:30.059

Mike Dias: I'm a pro audio manufacturer, so most people on my list, no surprise, are in my same business, right?

‍

251

00:42:30.090 --> 00:42:41.990

Mike Dias: And because it gets a little more granular when you're in the actual business, I'm gonna separate my list into people who are just like me, who are working for pro audio manufacturers.

‍

252

00:42:42.050 --> 00:42:49.430

Mike Dias: And I could get really specific, and I could say owners of pro audio manufacturing companies, or VPs, or sales guys.

‍

253

00:42:50.380 --> 00:42:52.690

Mike Dias: But I also interface with a lot of…

‍

254

00:42:52.870 --> 00:42:56.029

Mike Dias: Touring engineers and tour managers, so…

‍

255

00:42:56.190 --> 00:43:01.539

Mike Dias: My list looks like that. Each of your lists are going to be different, and also in my list, I do a lot with

‍

256

00:43:02.050 --> 00:43:17.990

Mike Dias: with content creators, and with marketing teams, and ad agencies, right? So, my 10 to 20 groupings are going to be different than your 10 to 20 groupings, but you'll see those patterns, and they'll emerge naturally as you're going through your exercise.

‍

257

00:43:18.460 --> 00:43:27.719

Mike Dias: And to tie this all together, what happens when you have those patterns, and what happens when you have your level of familiarity, and your…

‍

258

00:43:28.210 --> 00:43:35.740

Mike Dias: your shared interest overlaps, is that you've accidentally built yourself an incredibly versatile CRM

‍

259

00:43:35.970 --> 00:43:46.389

Mike Dias: That gets out of your brain and into a system that you can really use for when you need something. And this is where it gets really interesting, right? Because…

‍

260

00:43:48.250 --> 00:43:51.929

Mike Dias: Our brains are very good at holding one or two…

‍

261

00:43:52.230 --> 00:43:54.360

Mike Dias: Things in them at a time.

‍

262

00:43:54.500 --> 00:44:05.109

Mike Dias: Usually, the people that we just met are the newest people, and a lot more difficult of holding people that we've known for 5 years… 5 years past, or 10 years past, and…

‍

263

00:44:05.370 --> 00:44:11.589

Mike Dias: What's great about this system is this is a system of longevity, this isn't a one and done, this is a system for all time.

‍

264

00:44:12.050 --> 00:44:14.000

Mike Dias: And so, if you do this right.

‍

265

00:44:15.010 --> 00:44:21.199

Mike Dias: if somebody says, hey, I'm looking for… a dealer in Asia.

‍

266

00:44:21.390 --> 00:44:23.639

Mike Dias: That can help me move some in-ears.

‍

267

00:44:24.060 --> 00:44:28.000

Mike Dias: You're like, oh, I don't, I don't know that. I can't do that. I can't help you with that.

‍

268

00:44:28.310 --> 00:44:32.050

Mike Dias: But oh my god, I took a class on networking from this guy.

‍

269

00:44:32.270 --> 00:44:33.990

Mike Dias: I think he might be your guy.

‍

270

00:44:34.720 --> 00:44:47.080

Mike Dias: And that's where you make 1 and 1 equal 3, right? Because if you've classified how well you know somebody, shared overlap, and what they do, then you really can pick and choose and make all these things come together.

‍

271

00:44:48.820 --> 00:44:50.750

Mike Dias: And when you're doing this.

‍

272

00:44:51.720 --> 00:44:59.159

Mike Dias: I want you to be… I want you to recognize that when you're looking at your own patterns, how small our worlds actually are.

‍

273

00:44:59.560 --> 00:45:00.350

Mike Dias: Right?

‍

274

00:45:00.770 --> 00:45:03.560

Mike Dias: The longer that you do something.

‍

275

00:45:03.720 --> 00:45:06.879

Mike Dias: The more everybody in your network looks just like you.

‍

276

00:45:07.010 --> 00:45:08.319

Mike Dias: For the most part.

‍

277

00:45:09.180 --> 00:45:21.540

Mike Dias: And I say that because I actually think it's really liberating, and I think that that's the reason that we should put ourselves in new and somewhat awkward or uncomfortable situations when we say yes and we show up, because

‍

278

00:45:21.710 --> 00:45:25.220

Mike Dias: If we don't, if we don't ever stretch out of our comfort zone.

‍

279

00:45:25.450 --> 00:45:39.319

Mike Dias: our network will look just like us. And when our network looks just like us, that also means our network thinks just like us, and confirms all of our biases, and we start to think that the world

‍

280

00:45:39.720 --> 00:45:41.850

Mike Dias: Is only what we see it to be.

‍

281

00:45:42.650 --> 00:45:48.929

Mike Dias: And that's not the world at all. The world is infinitely large, and yet infinitely small.

‍

282

00:45:50.040 --> 00:45:59.689

Mike Dias: And if we think of ourselves as explorers and turning over new maps, jumping into situations where we don't know anybody, where we're not with our own tribe.

‍

283

00:45:59.990 --> 00:46:07.409

Mike Dias: Let's us go and explore a new territory, a new country, and to find new things that inform the way we think, inform the way we look at the world.

‍

284

00:46:07.770 --> 00:46:10.789

Mike Dias: And inform about who we're bringing onto our team.

‍

285

00:46:10.930 --> 00:46:18.669

Mike Dias: Right? Because again, if the whole point of all of this is so that we can achieve our biggest goals and dreams.

‍

286

00:46:19.770 --> 00:46:25.210

Mike Dias: And because we have an infinite view of who can be on our team to help us.

‍

287

00:46:26.340 --> 00:46:36.009

Mike Dias: Then we really want to make sure that we have as many people from as many diverse pools and backgrounds to give us the best advice and the best leg up forward.

‍

288

00:46:36.370 --> 00:46:37.919

Mike Dias: That we possibly can.

‍

289

00:46:38.630 --> 00:46:48.090

Mike Dias: And I also talk about The world being so large, And so big, because It gives me real hope.

‍

290

00:46:49.190 --> 00:46:54.599

Mike Dias: in answering why I believe most people don't like to network or meet new people.

‍

291

00:46:55.180 --> 00:46:59.440

Mike Dias: Because… At the very end of the day, we are all…

‍

292

00:46:59.600 --> 00:47:05.339

Mike Dias: social beings, and I think one of the scariest things that we can do when we put ourselves out there

‍

293

00:47:06.130 --> 00:47:10.240

Mike Dias: Is get faced with the idea of, Well…

‍

294

00:47:10.720 --> 00:47:17.819

Mike Dias: I shared me, like I was authentic, me and my interests, and they didn't like me.

‍

295

00:47:18.600 --> 00:47:20.350

Mike Dias: And I feel rejected.

‍

296

00:47:21.450 --> 00:47:27.530

Mike Dias: And that's real, and that's going to happen, and there's over 8 billion people on the planet, and if…

‍

297

00:47:27.640 --> 00:47:31.809

Mike Dias: Some people don't overlap with your same overlaps.

‍

298

00:47:32.410 --> 00:47:33.479

Mike Dias: That's okay.

‍

299

00:47:33.660 --> 00:47:39.369

Mike Dias: You're not going to like everybody that you meet when you genuinely try, and not everybody's going to like you.

‍

300

00:47:39.620 --> 00:47:49.649

Mike Dias: And that really is okay, and just because you don't have a common overlap, doesn't mean that you can't still stay respectful for who they are and what they do.

‍

301

00:47:50.040 --> 00:47:55.710

Mike Dias: And it's okay that some people stay as 1s, and some people stay at twos.

‍

302

00:47:56.060 --> 00:48:08.300

Mike Dias: Because, inevitably, you will bank more threes, 4s, and fives. Everybody has a place, and the more you are your authentic self, and the more you get to do this, and the more you get to show up and cheerlead and root for people.

‍

303

00:48:08.730 --> 00:48:11.050

Mike Dias: And the more you get to help and facilitate.

‍

304

00:48:11.890 --> 00:48:14.890

Mike Dias: Achieve your dreams and achieve dreams for everyone else.

‍

305

00:48:16.530 --> 00:48:20.720

Mike Dias: It's just math and probability and statistics, and when you approach it with that.

‍

306

00:48:20.840 --> 00:48:24.409

Mike Dias: Level of honesty and transparency and reality.

‍

307

00:48:24.810 --> 00:48:32.799

Mike Dias: It takes all the fears of networking away, and it takes all the concerns of going into new situations away, because two things are real.

‍

308

00:48:33.850 --> 00:48:38.669

Mike Dias: Any situation where we feel nervous about, oh my god, I'm gonna go into this room.

‍

309

00:48:39.110 --> 00:48:49.229

Mike Dias: I'm not gonna know anybody. The truth is, is that room is just a fractal version of you anyway, because our own maps, we're just not getting that far from our centers, no matter how far we try.

‍

310

00:48:49.380 --> 00:48:55.529

Mike Dias: And so it's really difficult to feel nervous going into someplace new when you realize that they're really just us.

‍

311

00:48:56.800 --> 00:49:04.540

Mike Dias: And… If you go into that room and it doesn't work, and something goes wrong, You tried.

‍

312

00:49:04.770 --> 00:49:07.430

Mike Dias: You move on. The next day is the next day.

‍

313

00:49:08.230 --> 00:49:11.459

Mike Dias: And to me, I think that's the most exciting part of it, and…

‍

314

00:49:11.930 --> 00:49:20.340

Mike Dias: everything we've talked about in these first two sessions is really selfish. Like, how does this work for me? Like, how are these people helping support

‍

315

00:49:20.550 --> 00:49:30.059

Mike Dias: my wants when I need something. What we're going to talk about in the third session is how we flip this on our head, and how we actually think about how we show up on everybody else's map.

‍

316

00:49:30.190 --> 00:49:40.349

Mike Dias: Rather than how people show up on ours. And to me, this is where it just gets radically exciting, and I don't want to… I don't want to spoil it for there, but I do want to just kind of lay this out, that…

‍

317

00:49:40.500 --> 00:49:47.549

Mike Dias: All of this work is not just to help us achieve our goals and dreams and grow our audience and help build our community.

‍

318

00:49:47.770 --> 00:49:51.350

Mike Dias: But doing this for everybody that we possibly can meet.

‍

319

00:49:52.300 --> 00:50:02.049

Mike Dias: Cool. Thank you, all three of you, for letting me do this tonight. I really appreciate it. I want to be really respectful of everybody's time, but I'm happy to stay on for…

‍

320

00:50:02.500 --> 00:50:04.060

Mike Dias: the next session.

‍

321

00:50:04.480 --> 00:50:18.369

Mike Dias: is going to be live broadcast from the awards ceremony. So it'll be recorded and broadcast from the awards ceremony, so it'll be next Friday. I will actually be in New York, and I will bring a special guest with me.

‍

322

00:50:18.690 --> 00:50:21.499

Mike Dias: Yes, you're coming to New York?

‍

323

00:50:21.670 --> 00:50:28.170

Mike Dias: Then we are… If… if your whiskey is not in New York.

‍

324

00:50:28.300 --> 00:50:33.369

Mike Dias: Or if it is, you'll tell me where I can find it, so that we can… we can… we can try it together.

‍

325

00:50:36.770 --> 00:50:40.369

Mike Dias: what I was saying while you're typing this, I'm bringing a special guest, I'll bring a box.

‍

326

00:50:41.770 --> 00:50:57.120

Mike Dias: You'll bring a bottle for us. We'll share it with… I will definitely enjoy it with you, but I will enjoy it. Dot, I don't know it's on Corey's schedule, so I will double-check with Corey to see what time the broadcast is for everybody.

‍

327

00:50:57.480 --> 00:51:00.340

Mike Dias: And, and it will also be recorded,

‍

328

00:51:00.930 --> 00:51:16.159

Mike Dias: But Nick Canovas, the gentleman from Mike the Snare that focuses on doing the work that I shared in that very first article, Nick is New York-based as well, and Nick will join me for the keynote. And so it's going to be really fun, because

‍

329

00:51:16.930 --> 00:51:21.639

Mike Dias: There's nothing about me that wants to take any credit for Nick's career. He had this already.

‍

330

00:51:21.720 --> 00:51:39.179

Mike Dias: But I was able to work with Nick the whole time he was launching and going through this, and I got to watch him grow from 60,000 subs to over 350,000 subs by implementing all the practices that we talk about through these sessions.

‍

331

00:51:39.310 --> 00:51:45.999

Mike Dias: Because we were doing this together, collectively, while placing product for earthwork microphones. And so…

‍

332

00:51:46.300 --> 00:52:01.010

Mike Dias: Nick got to watch everything that we're talking play out in real time, and then take it home and do it for his real career, not just his day job, and to grow his content creation to a place where he could stop working for me.

‍

333

00:52:02.020 --> 00:52:03.499

Mike Dias: Which is really awesome.

‍

334

00:52:04.370 --> 00:52:07.970

Mike Dias: Any questions? I don't want to keep anybody, especially you, Tara.

‍

335

00:52:08.150 --> 00:52:10.750

Mike Dias: 1230.

‍

336

00:52:12.790 --> 00:52:13.490

Emily Saunders: Yeah.

‍

337

00:52:13.770 --> 00:52:16.120

Mike Dias: Thank you, everybody. I really appreciate it.

‍

338

00:52:16.500 --> 00:52:18.439

Dot Cannon: Thank you. Have a safe journey.

‍

339

00:52:18.660 --> 00:52:19.160

Mike Dias: Thank you.

‍

340

00:52:19.160 --> 00:52:20.469

Emily Saunders: Yeah, enjoy.

‍

341

00:52:20.470 --> 00:52:22.600

Mike Dias: I'll see everybody in New York. Bye.

‍